For years he lived with jealousy, anger, and confusion raging war in his head. Today, Mark is discovering true freedom and inner peace.

“I grew up in a middle-class, ranch-style home in Fresno County. I have a younger brother who is a Highway Patrolman. My mom and dad both worked hard and provided everything we needed. Though I was an honor roll student with a friendly personality, I was also awkward. I envied people around me who seemed to have what I thought I was missing. It led me down a path I now find hard to understand.”

 

Mark’s story of God’s love for him began long before we met him. It started with an encounter in 2009; a guest speaker – a gentleman, also named Mark – was sharing his testimony of recovery and redemption with a group of men enrolled in a rehab program across town. After listening to details of his personal victory, Mark was encouraged and thought, “I could do this, too.” Later, after speaking with him one-on-one, Mark was given the name of a church he could visit to get better connected. [Mark didn’t go]

In 2016, still struggling with his addiction to alcohol and drugs, Mark attended an introductory meeting at Celebrate Recovery. The CR group was connected to the church he failed to visit in 2009. Through that church, Mark met Tony, a well-dressed man who welcomed him at the church entrance. Mark thought, “This guy is just like me,” though he knew nothing about him. Later, after a long discussion, Tony told Mark, “You need to surrender to God.” [Mark didn’t surrender]… at the time, Mark also didn’t know Tony was a graduate of the Academy program.

A few months later, Mark met Ray at the same church. Ray worked for the FRM Academy. Again, Mark thought, “He’s easy to talk to; down-to-earth.” After speaking one-on-one, Ray gave him his business card, inviting him to take a tour of the Academy program. [Mark didn’t call]

Then, a few weeks later, Mark read a Facebook post a friend from Jr. High shared announcing his graduation from the Mission’s Academy program. They connected. In their discussion, his friend told him to call Frankie, another friend from their Jr. High days who worked for the Academy program. Mark finally walked through our doors December 7, 2017.

It took EIGHT YEARS, but God finally got Mark’s attention.


It’s difficult to imagine Mark, as he describes, living as he once lived. Yet, his willingness to be open and transparent is a blessing.

“My biggest problem was myself. I had anger issues. To sum up the damage I caused in 40 years: I sold drugs in high school, joined a street gang for the money, prestige, and protection, and committed countless crimes, including possession of drugs and stolen property, grand theft auto, and four separate domestic violence charges. My aspirations in life were to be known as a hard-core thug whose name was in news headlines.”

Thankfully, Mark’s aspirations failed. Though his past was certainly peppered with riotous living and pain-filled moments he caused, the public reputation he thought he was building was nothing more than fantasy. “I was a quiet person I drank and smoked weed. Most of the arguments I had with the people in my life took place in my mind, without their knowledge. I would secretly hate them for hurting me in some way. The best example I have started with my family. My dad encouraged me and my younger brother to consider attending a private high school to help us achieve our goals, away from the public school system. I thought he was just getting on my case, not wanting me to be happy with my friends and where I was. So, my brother took dad’s advice and I didn’t. I grew more distant from both of them. For years I blamed them for my unhappy outcomes, jealous of my brother’s success. Conversations and arguments I created with them in my head kept me angry. Over the years, I did the same thing with everyone I knew: ‘They were the problem.’

When I would meet Christian men who were, at one time, just like me (yet God had clearly freed them from their addictions and pain), I began wanting what they had, too. It took a long time to have the courage to admit I couldn’t achieve what they had achieved on my own. No matter how much money I made and no matter how hard I tried to be a good father and a good man, my weaknesses and the inner turmoil I felt would continue to hurt the people I loved. What I eventually discovered was they hadn’t changed their own lives. Jesus had. I heard that truth a lot in prison and in church, but it took years for me to recognize that the reason I was hearing it was because God was speaking through them to get my attention. I finally listened. I’m so glad I did.”

Today, Mark is preparing to transition from the Academy program into Aftercare. Because of your prayerful support of our ministries and because of those whose lives were changed through our ministries years before, Mark is now a new man. He loves the Lord, loves his 4-year-old daughter, and is looking forward to taking college courses (though his final pursuits are not yet known). He shared, “I love the people I’ve met through the Mission and I want to help others like so many people have helped me along the way. People tell me I’m easy to talk to and that I seem to understand their struggles – and I do. To me, it’s a gift from God – a desire He placed in me when I first read these words in 2 Corinthians 4…”

 

“…we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard-pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body.” 2 Corinthians 4:7-9


Mark’s story appeared in the January 2019 edition of Lighthouse News.

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Hard-Pressed

From the age of 13, Felipe was a gang member. Now, age 34, he has no memories of a family Christmas.

“I lived without any peace for over 20 years. Because I was always at war with other gangs, my family had no peace either. To this day I have no explanation for being alive or never being shot. I was always armed and was involved in countless shootouts. It wasn’t until I lost my brother and my mother that I walked away from the lifestyle. My brother (age 18) was killed in an auto accident on September 27, 2015, and my mom, who battled complications from diabetes, passed away on November 8, 2015, from the sadness of his loss. All of a sudden I could feel the pain of deep loss, something that I had caused others. It just hit me. I couldn’t do that to people anymore.”

Felipe sought help through the Fresno Rescue Mission but left after 4 months to try recovery through an outpatient program. It wasn’t enough. Eventually, he came back.

“I was sitting in the chapel service at the Mission one evening and felt like the chaplain was speaking about me. Every word he said was about my life, playing out in every detail. I can’t explain what happened next, but I felt free. Listening to Him talk about Jesus gave me hope. The Lord was suddenly there, and very real to me. At that moment I committed my efforts to the program and committed my life to follow Jesus. I called my probation officer and told her I was back at the FRM Academy. Even though I only had 3 months remaining on my probation, I knew I needed more than a release from the courts. I needed the life God was promising me.”

No longer a threat, Felipe is working toward a new kind of life. Because of the time he spent living on the streets, he never finished school. Even when he attended school, he struggled. “My reading comprehension level is very low, so I will be taking GED courses for a long time. It’s something I need to move forward, but it’s also something I really want. I struggle when I try to read Scripture. For now, I just listen to what I hear other people read and hear. They sound so smart and they get things I don’t. Reading is not easy, but I won’t give up. I want to hear God talk to me in His Word like others do.”

Felipe has now finished his 1-year residential portion of the Academy program. He transitioned into Aftercare and was hired by the Mission to work as our Cook in Food Services.  “I love working in the kitchen and learning from the rest of the staff. I’m very shy – it’s an odd personality trait when I consider the reputation I used to have, running the streets – a time when people were afraid of me. Now, being around people who are kind is new to me. The program staff and the men enrolled in the program help me grow and engage. I also like the people I meet who come in for meals. There was a time when I would have used their pain and addiction to build up my gang status and reputation. Today, I cook for them. It feels good.

Actually, my whole life changed. My friends and family no longer see me in the same way either. God has changed me so much that my life has become a living testimony to His love, power and continued grace. He restored my connection to the people I loved and missed. Because of that, this year I’ll be home for Christmas. It will be the first time in,…I can’t even remember. No more violence, and no more worries that bullets will fly through the walls unexpectedly. From now on, I’m living with hope in the future God has for me.”

Felipe’s story appeared in the December 2018 edition of Lighthouse News.

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I’ll Be home for Christmas

~ By Simon Aguilar – Academy graduate and current Academy volunteer

I entered the FRM Academy in August 2014. Having been through years of abusive relationships and drug use, I was broken and ready for change, and the staff was ready to help. But within three months I was aching to leave. The enemy used the weaknesses I felt from pain and addiction to wage war on my mind. My family was struggling and I was struggling. Giving up seemed like the right thing to do at the time, that is until someone reminded me that the enemy is a liar. This was something I had heard in a Bible class but hadn’t really understood.

Soon after, things changed – not at home and not with my problems, but in my mind. The experiences I was having matched what I was learning. Because of that, I found a reason to stay. I stopped trying to control everything and instead surrendered to God. I never would have learned how to do that without people around me that cared about me. I was surrounded by staff and volunteers, people who strengthened me for the good of my family and my future. Every time the enemy tried to tear me down, they were right there building me up. I thank God for their commitment.

By the time I finished the Academy program, my family relationships had been restored. I found a job and I set out to succeed. At first, I was ok but then old thoughts crept up and tore me down again. It was only by God’s grace and power that I stayed strong and sober. The Lord spoke to my heart and reminded me that I knew how to stay sober while facing difficult situations. He reminded me that I needed to help others. My response was, “I’ll do it later.” Wow! I still can’t believe how selfish I was. It wasn’t until I started to feel like I was having health problems that my attitude changed.

My heart wasn’t beating normally and it felt like it was hurting all the time. I thought about God’s call and decided to come back to the Rescue Mission and volunteer my time as a mentor. I needed to share what I had been learning. Commitment to God is more than a feeling. It’s a purpose in living that needs to be shared. It’s what I learned in the program. Mission staff and volunteers strengthen me in my weakness because of their walk with God. It was the missing piece I needed to remain strong in my faith. It all works together.

Sometimes we may think we have all the time in the world to change, to learn, or to help others, but we really don’t. Our time is both precious and limited. So I’ve gotten busy. I work, I care for my family and friends, and I now commit time to advance God’s kingdom. I’ll do this for as long as He allows my heart to keep beating.

Simon’s story appeared in the September 2018 edition of Lighthouse News.

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My Heart Beats For You, God

Education Is Key

“Your support gives us courage.”

Courage is an important factor for men and woman who step through our doors.  Many have spent the better part of their lives feeling that failure defines them.  Whether or not they were fortunate enough to have loving people in their lives to help them, the results were the same; something was missing.  They lacked the power, drive, and grit it would take to step forward to overcome the fear and pain they carried deep within.

JASMINE shared, “I’m 26 and I’ve struggled with addiction since I was 15.  My mom was an addict, so addiction was certainly a learned behavior.”  Other behaviors were a matter of choice for Jasmine.  She was a teen mom who dropped out of high school, having had both of her children by the time she was 17.  “I wanted a loving family because I didn’t have one.”  Jasmine is like many.  Her story is a jumbled mix of painful circumstance; some by choice and some not.

We asked Jasmine (and two of our Academy disciples) to share with you who they are today as they look to the future.  This is what they had to share:

 “On November 1, 2017,  I became a disciple at Rescue the Children.  On that day I made a choice and I took my life back. It was through the program that Jesus Christ entered my heart and I’ll never be the same.  In the nine months I’ve been here I’ve learned I am loved.  I’ve learned to love myself, to love my kids, and to trust God to supply for my needs.   Through this process, I also realize how important education is.  I am going to get my G.E.D. before leaving Rescue the Children.  Then I want to start college.  My goals are to be a great mom, to work toward my CNA, and eventually to have a career as an RN.  I decided I want a career, not a job.”     ~ Jasmine

 

DID YOU KNOW…?

GED and LITERACY classes are mandatory program components for all men and women who are lacking one or both.  The GED (General Equivalency Development or General Equivalency Diploma) is made up of 4 subjects, broken into separate exams that, when passed, provide the taker with high school-level academic skills.  In truth, without GED all other educational opportunities afforded through our programs would be overly challenging for those coming to us in their current condition.  Education provides more than reading and mathematical skills.  It teaches us to reason and to make better choices.

 

HARLEY shared, “I’ve had other opportunities to work toward my GED, but I never took it seriously.  It wasn’t until I saw another disciple passed his Social Studies practice test that I began to want it.  He inspired me.  I tackled Social Studies and Science, but I struggled in Math, failing my first attempt by 3 points.  So, I brushed it off, continued to study, and 3 weeks later took the test again.  This time I passed!”   ~ Harley

Every person’s experience is unique.  With volunteers, we are able to provide classroom instruction and one-on-one attention to keep men and women motivated, even when they lack fundamental habits and skills.

 

 

JOSE shared, “I grew up in an environment where educational pursuits were not nurtured. No one encouraged academic responsibility, so my homework and study habits were not developed.  By the time I was 16 I was a drop-out with an 8th-grade education.  I turned to a life on the streets and all that came with it.  By the time I entered the FRM Academy, I was broken, lost, and completely hopeless.  My vision of ever becoming someone of value and purpose had faded away.”

 

Learning to accept that the details from their past no longer define them, our disciples are encouraged to move beyond blame and take steps to be responsible for their futures.

 

Jose is now 28, wearing a bright smile and an attitude of success.
“With focus, determination, and hard work I obtained my GED.  This was something I didn’t have to do alone.  With support from Mission staff and all the volunteers who dedicate their time helping me, I made it!   They helped me understand that God has a plan for me, not just spiritually, but in who He made me to be. I keep this Scripture verse and my “little” poem as reminders:

 

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make straight your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6

“Little By Little”
He does not lead me year by year,
Nor even day by day;
But step by step my path unfolds.
My Lord directs my way.

 

“Today, I’m learning that it’s never too late to reach important goals.  Thank you, Fresno Rescue Mission and all those who donate toward the work being done here.  Your support gives us courage.  Mostly, I thank God Almighty for the hope I now have in a successful future.”     ~ Jose

This story appeared in the August 2018 edition of Lighthouse News

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I Took My Life Back

Frank drank anti-freeze in 2001 and shot himself in the chest in 2017. Today, he smiles and finds joy in serving others. As he says,
“I understand their circumstances.”

Frank’s memories are sketchy and incomplete. He remembers disturbing moments from 50 years ago with the same level of intensity and emotion as if they were happening now. When he describes the death of his grandfather (a sad moment for Frank when he was only 7) and his subsequent barter with God, tears flow instantly. “I told God, ‘I won’t believe in you if you don’t bring my grandpa back.’”

Frank lives with the SYMPTOMS of depression.
At age 11 he numbed his pain with alcohol. By age 16 he had escalated to drugs, with cocaine growing to be his overall preference. Over the years he made choices that led to legal troubles and formed relationships with unstable people that created added chaos. Every negative outcome produced then justified his feelings of worthlessness. “It wasn’t until I asked Jesus into my life that I discovered I had value. Knowing Him didn’t remove the pain I felt. In fact, I struggled with suicidal thoughts on a daily basis. What knowing Him did do for me was it allowed information to slowly sink in and help me battle the negative thoughts I was experiencing with the truth His Word provided.”

The Mission works with hundreds of men and women just like Frank – people who are gifted and bright, but who have years of negative history that leads them to believe they don’t fit in – who feel that no one, not even God, can help them. Like you, we are so pleased when they finally begin to experience new outcomes by simply making new choices and building healthier relationships.

“Depression runs in my family. There are four of us who have to take antidepressant medication to battle the physical effects. The meds stabilize me, but it’s the Scriptural teaching and the healthy relationships I’ve formed since entering the program that has changed the way I now live. The Academy classes and instructors help me find answers and renew my thoughts. My assigned counselor helps me understand how my brain works so I can reason better. My mentor is also an electives instructor at the Mission, so I get the relationship and I get to watch him interact with others, living out his faith openly. Recently I was asked what I would say to someone who supports Mission programs if I had the chance. That was simple: ‘You saved my life. Because the Mission exists, I have the tools I need to move forward and live with peace in my heart. This place is a sanctuary.’”

Frank’s story appears in the July 2018 edition of Lighthouse News.

You can be a living example of hope in someone’s life.
Our programs are always in need of more mentors, tutors, ministry helpers, Biblical counselors, and anyone who has the time (typically 1 to 2 hours per week) to invest and commit in the lives of the people we serve. With this need is always the care we take to caution, just as Scripture does. “For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it?” Luke 14:28 (ESV)

Trauma affects everyone but in different measure. For those who suffer from addiction, the view of a traumatic episode is often skewed. Add to this the stress of entering a recovery program, the added endurance needed to physically work and study each day, and the emotional challenge of interacting with hundreds of new faces and personalities – It isn’t hard to see that the men and women we serve are incredibly vulnerable.

So, when loving volunteers offer their time to stand beside the people we serve and guide them, either as a mentor, or teacher, or to fill any number of volunteer opportunities, careful consideration to commitment is necessary. The moment ‘someone’ doesn’t show up on time (or at all), or forgets to reschedule due to conflicts, the mind sees it as a personal judgment. To the addicted mind, it becomes an added trauma that reminds them of all the times they were the let-down or that they let others down. To the volunteer (should one of our men or women suddenly leave the program without warning), they are tempted to feel they didn’t do enough, it was their fault, or even feel no one was grateful for the time they gave.

Relationships are never easy, but with the right perspective in place, they are always rewarding. Love has no constraints. Given freely, it always yields what God intended.

As you volunteer – whether in service of the Mission or anywhere within the kingdom – please remember that your love and commitment matter. For Frank and others like him, they are life-saving.

Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God!
How unsearchable are His judgments and His ways past finding out!
– Romans 11:33 (NKJV)

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“You Saved My Life”

“Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed.” John 8:36 (NKJV)

Efren cried out to God over a decade ago. At the time he was sitting in jail facing serious charges for a crime he didn’t commit. “I ended up serving time in prison. I kept reading my Bible, praying for help, and sharing the things I was learning with other inmates. The experience was real, but there was still so much I didn’t understand.”

Efren spent most of his teen years drinking, using drugs, running with gang members, and moving from school to school. He had committed plenty of criminal acts, both in his youth and as a young man, but this time the charges seemed to define him in a way that really hurt him deeply. He was no longer able to control the pain and anger that was building inside of him. He shared, “By the time I met the Lord, I wanted help, but I didn’t know what help really looked like.” After prison, he slowly slipped away into old habits. He continued to make poor choices. Though he was also in a relationship and raising children, he was emotionally vacant. His oldest son was fully engaged in the gang lifestyle; drinking, acting out, in-and-out of trouble, and unable to communicate his feelings. His daughter was in a relationship with a gang member. Efren’s two younger children, both barely in grade school, would likely have followed the same path had things not changed. In the summer of 2017, Efren entered the FRM Academy program.

“I came to the Mission intending to hide out. My relationship was ending and my youngest kids were not with me. They were living with their mom. My older kids were heading for trouble, and I was just tired. To be honest, I had no idea that the Mission was Christ-centered when I showed up. Looking back, I know God directed me here.

While in the program, I learned my teen-aged son was locked up in a juvenile facility facing serious charges for a crime he didn’t commit. I felt responsible. I hadn’t been a good father and everyone I loved was paying for the choices I had made. I knew he was where I once was. Like me, my son hates the drinking and the violence, the intimidation and aggression, and especially the constant survival mentality you live under when you’re in a gang. So this time, feeling that the Lord was once more at work in my life, I started praying for my family (especially my son and daughter), talking to God in ways I never had before. Ten months later, I am now seeing the results of those first steps of faith; my son is getting the help he needs to turn his life around. The courts placed him in a special program. I’m finding that I enjoy the things the Bible is teaching me. Today I can forgive the people who once hurt me. I’m also learning things about myself I never knew before, like why I was so angry. But the most amazing part is that I finally understand what freedom really is. I found it in Jesus. He’s changing my heart.”

“My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.” Galatians 2:20 (NLT)

“The Mission is great. The staff and all the volunteers really make a difference. I’m impressed by all the people who actually love Jesus and (because of Him) care for people like me who are lost or less fortunate. Here, I learned to seek God’s will for my life. Now, I turn to Him a lot. I may never fully know the outcome of all my prayers, but I know that it’s only through Christ that real change is possible. Today, when I share His love with people around me, I’m not just spouting words. I’m fully engaged – even playing with my young children and grandchild. When I visit them, they’re happy to see me. Through Christ, I’m mending broken relationships, even with my older kids. I’m creating new friendships and taking steps to prepare for a new kind of life with the Lord, preparing to graduate from the program in a few months. I haven’t felt this happy since I was just a little boy.

It’s a good start to a new life.”

Efren’s story appears in the June 2018 edition of Lighthouse News.

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Free Indeed